RAHHHH

today is a very cranky day because instead of being able to sleep at 10 last night, i ended up having gastric instead :( so i couldnt sleep well for the rest of the night, darn. ended up sleeping during op presentation cos my grp was the last. oh well, i'm really grateful to mrs lee for understanding and letting me sleep. i was really exhausted, thank you. After that, had extra op ractice with bernard tan& mrs lee & it went really well.

Note to self: i need to learn my speech at the tip of my fingertips.



Disclaimer: this will be a emo/ angsty post
i kw i shouldnt be saying this, but i'm frustrated over whats happening in choir. i always felt that choir should be about the conductor and the choristers. we are like a h20, we need each other because once its broken, either of us will become a totally diff element. BUT this is NOT HAPPENING AT ALL. i understand that you are busy but why are you always late for practices?! & let me emphasize its not like you are late a few times, you are ALWAYS LATE even when the new choir members came today. i mean come on, you always dont even tell us why you are late & because of your lateness, we all have to stay back! what is this? its like you dont even care about us at all. if you did, you will make it a point to at least come on time. but wait, not even once?! this is TOO MUCH. you know, i'm sure the choir is more than willing to work tgt with you, but with your dont bother attitude to come on time for practices clearly does NOT bond us tgt, really. Also, you are being TOO nice and lax with us, i mean you dont even correct us when we sing super off-pitch and all and worse of all, you dont even scold when someone does something wrong. i feel like i am detoriating after every single practice rather than improving.how are we going for syf like this?! i mean are we just going to be satisfied getting a bronze or COP?! i dont think so. but at this rate we are going, i have to say bluntly we WILL GET A COP. i'm serious abt this. really, we are trying very hard to work tgt with you and to improve, but if you dont really give us feedback on what we need to improve on and keep thinking of this as a post-exam syndrome, then I'M SORRY DONT EVER THINK OF GOING SYF. we will only embarass ourselves, period.

Oh and come on, i dont understand why its so diff for someone to try to SING when he CAN actually sing. i mean why be scared that you go off pitch or whatsoever? i went off so many times before,i'm sure others had to. But we learn from our mistakes and improve on it, dont we? i mean, at least try. dont just stand there and let DEXTER have a one-man show for god's sake and not even open your mouth.people cant even hear you sing when they stand next to you. you are just opening your mouth to let the air go in. i heard you sing before, and i kw you can. you did it last time rmb? why not now? WHY? why didnt you even when mr chen told you to? & the worse thing was even when mr chen told you that "if you didnt sing, i will get the girls to do any punishment they want to you", you still kept as quiet as a mouse throughout the WHOLE ENTIRE PRACTICE. and oh god, mr chen didnt even scold you for being so selfish to let dexter sing alone. come on, bases/ tenors is not only abt dexter but its also you or rather, anyone who is present during prac. IT IRRITATES ME IS THAT YOU DONT EVEN TRY. ARGH

i'm sorry to say this, but i lost my motivation for going choir and i found out that others feel the same way too. hopefully, all will be better after the teachers talk to him and that YOU will try since MORE guys are here now. if not, i swear i am going to flare up, i dont bloody care.

WTH i think i was so tired and angry or rather frustrated at the same time after choir that i almost fainted while walking to the coffeeshop. DARN IT